I'm not going to waste one breath on what the news is focusing on today.....

Days like today are kind of frustrating for me. It seems sometimes that what is really important is lost in the haze (literally in this case) of politics or something else that is screaming for attention and hiding what should never be forgotten.

I haven't forgotten that day. I never will. On April 20, 1999, I had just come home to my sorority house from my class to see the rest of my sisters gathered in the main room around the television, most of them in tears.....all of their faces in a state of shock. The scene on the screen at that very moment was that of the SWAT team surrounding the school. I tucked in on the couch, got caught up to what was going on, and then I felt a feeling of fear. I had two cousins in higschool in that area. I didn't remember which one. I ran to the phone to call my mom and make sure it wasn't there school. After she confirmed it wasn't, I expected to feel a sigh of relief. But I didn't, because I turned back to the t.v. to see a kid trying to jump out the window. It was a scene I couldn't believe. One that I never thought I would see again.

The problem is that we do continue to see it. More and more in fact. What scares me is that now when we see it on television, we do still pay attention. We do still listen. We do still pray. But we have almost become numb to it. It is just another thing. Kind of like another car accident. Something that just happens. Something that we know is going to happen, we just hope that it isn't as bad as we expect it to be.

It saddens me. And I will be honest. It scares the hell out of me to send my children to school. It isn't isolated anymore, it isn't just high school, and it isn't just a one-time deal anymore. The other day there was the incident with the kindegartner having a loaded gun at school. WTH?

Regardless, there is much more I could say about this, but I will stop with this and just say that I haven't forgotten. I still remember all those parents that are missing their babies so badly today. I still remember the fear we all felt. And those children aren't forgotten.